Grew up in Stamford.

I’m a greasy no-good WOP from Stamford, CT who used to have big greasy hair, straight out of central casting. Those Blue-Blood back-country chicks couldn’t get enough of slumming it w/ young Ferndog. I couldn’t talk to a girl in my own high school, but could talk to girls completely and entirely out of my league for reals.

If you’re a young man, go buy a track suit, wear a black t-shirt w/ gold cross worn specifically on the outside, perhaps an Italian horn / pepper, or a little boot of Italy. Try and channel the spirit of one of Tony Soprano’s crew. Slick back your hair.

Unless you’re a pasty Irish dude that wears khakis and lived in Stanford or Zahm. Then, don’t even bother, as it’s pointless.