I know Mike Royko never said, “Some things you wonder, some things you think, and some things you just know”, but did he ever say, “It’s cold enough to freeze the balls off Santa Claus”?

When you have Irish-7 and Stanford-4 in a multi-game squares pool that will pay you a cool grand, 61 seconds feels like an eternity. When you have to depend on Don Criqui for information during that 61 seconds, it’s eternity with swearing. I’m pretty sure the game ended 45 seconds before he chose to mention it.

1.5 yards per rush. Damn.

That was a good old fashioned defensive struggle. Literally the first team to 17 won. But the difference is when you read the Cardinal depth chart on D, you see senior after senior. The Irish are getting this done with sophomores. I still think the first high-quality offense they’ll see is in two weeks, but the best outfits dominate the teams they’re supposed to dominate, so that part of the equation seems to be in place.

By the way, if Brian Van Gorder’s hand motions in the last minute of the game are any indication, the Notre Dame defense apparently has a play called “Hey, Check Out My Boobs”.

If in the midst of the madness of the game, the Notre Dame band can get in your head, it’s time for a nap because you’re wound just a little too tight.

205 total yards. Hot damn.

Who the hell doesn’t wear gloves when it’s cold?

New Bookstore Basketball team name: Van Gorder’s Blitz, the Notre Dame band, and three other things giving David Shaw a migraine.

Once again, Everett Golson took a sub-par overall performance and got the job done anyway. No sizzle, but a whole lotta steak. His memory is shorter than the line at the Carrot Top kissing booth. But it’d be nice if we didn’t have to keep rolling the dice. Seven is going to come up eventually.

Notre Dame’s receiving corps gets better by the game, and they’re still missing one of their best players. There are way too many weapons, and defensive coordinators will be challenged to stop them all. My skepticism about Stanford’s defensive ranking notwithstanding, 400 yards against that outfit is something to be proud of.

But having said that, if the Irish can’t get a quality performance from the running game next week, my confidence in an undefeated season is going to drop significantly. Offense is offense, fine, but some situations demand a competence in the running game, and I’d rather show we can do that before we get to Tallahassee.

Ditto for Malik Zaire not getting any field time. Golson’s durability seems to be a non-issue right now, but we all know that can change in a New York minute. We’re running out of weak sisters against whom we can get him minutes. Let’s get that done next week.

Someone from Stanford complaining about another school’s band … shoulda written about that one, Alanis.